New Conflict Resolution

One conflict that I would like to share is a recent issue at work with my boss. He has been my new boss for almost a little over a year and we are all getting to learn of  his  management  and communicative style. Our organization had received new guidance concerning our background check processing which is a critical piece in bringing new people on board. Unfortunately my new boss had been in the habit of keeping me out of the loop as it concerned my FCC program. This practice went on for quite some time and I became very frustrated with him as I wanted to know how to effectively communicate with him my thoughts and feelings. So, the opportunity presented itself so that I could talk to address the issue. He was not on the receive end as when I presented the issue he was preoccupied and really wasn’t listening but telling me what I wanted to hear. When I left the meeting I felt that this was an "unproductive conflict" that was not resolved (O'Hair, Wiemann, Mullin, & Teven (2015, p.214).  

The same practice was continuing and this time I had a major change with one of my trainers in my program. Due to the background check restraints, my numbers of FCC providers decreased therefore resulting in a decline in my support of a trainer. The decision was made by him (my boss) and our lead trainer to pull my training support. Rather than call me and have me come to his office and have a face to face conversation about his decision he sends me an email telling me that he was removing her altogether. To make a long story short, I found this to be unprofessional and disrespectful towards me. Later that morning, we had staff meeting and afterwards I was given the opportunity to talk to him again. I asked if I could have 2 minutes of his time, he agreed and I explained to him how I felt. It was not that I had my trainer taken away but it was because of his delivery of the news. I explained that I thought this was not right. This time I was upset but I had peace about the situation. This time, he intently listened, and I felt as if I had his undivided attention. I expressed that since he’s been my new boss that he has been so far removed from my FCC program and that I felt like he wasn’t interested. This time he listened, looked me in the eye and had apologized numerous times for being disinterested. His reasoning was that I had a program that he didn’t have to worry about or had major issues so he felt like he didn’t have to micromanage or be involved. I said this to say that this experience was frustrating and an eye-opener for me. I had to address the issue but had to go about it in a peaceable way and not be so upset or mad because he didn’t share the news of my program in the way in which I would have handled it.  Because I took some time to pray about the situation and waited to address it, he was on the receive end when he was confronted. As a result, I do receive emails and information from him more than I have ever before. 

Another strategy that I have learned is that you must go in peace and not be confrontational and judgmental. I’ve learned that healthy conflict is necessary and that it can provide positive feedback but also productive conflict. This situation has really taught me to always be mindful of how I am to not assume ideas about others and to communicate to them in a non-hostile approach. 

References 

O'Hair, D., Wiemann, M., Mullin, D. I., & Teven, J.  (2015). Real communication (3rd. ed). New

            York: Bedford/St. Martin's. Chapter 8, "Managing Conflict in Relationships"